On February 8, 2018, I shared the very first illustration for my book on social media. (You can read about it here.)
Today, May 29, 2018, I’m taking a moment to deeply feel all of the swirling emotions around my book because …
my book is almost complete.
As I reflect on this experience, I see that it took forever to get here and it went by all too quickly. Have you heard the expression “the years are short but the days are long”? In a lot of ways, that is how this has felt.
So often, we (I) simply want to skip all the middle stuff and just get there, already! Who cares about the process, who cares about the details, just show me the end result!
In this case, I could have chosen a process for a much quicker end result. I could have gone with the first self-publisher that provided me a quote for their services (even though it didn’t feel right to me) or I could have compromised the entire experience simply to get to the end result.
I chose not to.
Whether I knew it or not, I allowed this book to honor it’s own creation process, one that I didn’t have to force or fabricate. Once I let go of the need to get to the end result, this book created itself.
Of course I had to take action when action was to be taken, otherwise the words that form the foundation of this book would have passed by like clouds in the sky. Action is a necessary component. But I didn’t have to force it to become something it wasn’t ready to become.
I’m still in the process of seeing how letting go and surrendering is directly applicable to a world of deadlines and timelines and statutes of limitation. It’s easy for me to allow a creation process when I’m not dependent on it’s completion, within a certain time frame, for rent or food money. Maybe the answer to that one is that when we honor the process of each thing we are creating, we honor it’s timing, too. And, some things will move quicker than others because that is its natural cycle.
I like that answer.
After the next few days, I will not be able to undo my book. I will not be able to go back to a time and place where I didn’t know what my book would look and feel like. I will not be able to imagine what the book will be because, I will know. I will not not know.
There is so much magic in the unknown.
And yes, I also know that there can be so much fear in the unknown. What will it look like? Will it be what I expected? Will others like it too? Will anyone buy it? Will it end up as a giveaway at a garage sale? That fear can be consuming and detract from the overall experience that my book is trying to gift me.
Each experience is a gift.
The moment I stopped trying to force this book to come to life before it (or I) was ready, that was the moment that I allowed myself to receive the gifts and lessons and gorgeous experiences that she was trying to give me all along.
Honoring the creation process of “Mama, Where Is the Truth?” has given me:
- A deeper understanding of hope, faith & trust;
- An incredible new friend, mentor and co-creator, Jo Cauldrick;
- A more solid sense of the creation process, the subtleties, the energies, the timing;
- A gorgeous community of supporters and fellow dream-weavers;
- A new sense of confidence, I can do anything!;
- A new way of working in my life, honoring the energies & creative cycles of the moon;
- A deeper understanding of my own creative cycles, which brings so much more peace and fulfillment than ever before;
- New wisdom (gained from experience!) that I can now share with others around co-creating a book, so we can make more dreams come true!;
- Patience. The gift of patience!;
- A love for slowing down, I mean, the magic that happens when we slow down and enjoy the process!
There are so many ways in which I’ve grown throughout this experience, and I know that the growth will continue, because it never stops!
This has been (and will continue to be) one of the most beautifully creative experiences of my life.
Next time you want to bring one of your amazing ideas to life, I invite you to listen to her creative process. Ask her what she needs in order to come to life. Honor her timeline and her cycles. Have patience. Cultivate trust. Enjoy the process (the good, the bad and the ugly!) for each experience is there to elevate you to places you’ve never been before. And say thank you, every chance you get!
As of today, Jo and her husband Karl are finishing up the digital version of the book. Once that is complete, I’ll be sending it off to a printer for a test run! I
can’t wait I can wait to see what it looks like!
In total awe of you,