“If only things had been different …”

Unfulfilled potential.

To me, that is one of the hardest things to live with. “Imagine what she could have done … if only things had been different.”

I have heard these words spoken to me and about me many times in my life. Instantly, I would get defensive. I would think, “What do you mean? Look at everything I have accomplished!”

Today, through the lens of time and experience, I see that those words are quite true.

Today, I’m allowing myself to fully accept that I could have done more if only things had been different. If only I had chosen to make things different.

Today, I’m choosing to make things different.

We make excuses. I have kids. I have no money. I have no time. My husband travels. My dog is sick. I don’t know how to … and the list goes on and on.


That’s all they are. We can always  go around and blame our circumstances, others or life in general for why we have or don’t have something. “If only I had grown up on the other side of the street I would have gotten that plum CEO job.” “If only I had a parent who smiled more, I would be an accomplished writer.” “If only my dog wasn’t sick, I would travel more.”

If only, if only, if only.

What if, instead of letting the “if only” stop us, we let it propel us? What if it becomes an invitation to explore what you truly want instead of what you are just settling for? What if it becomes the opportunity you desire to go into deep reflection and refinement so you can literally take off like a rocket in any area you desire?


That’s all it is. My dear friend Peta shared this simple yet elegant nugget with me today. It’s not about doing anything else, it’s about simply being, fully and fiercely, all that you are. It’s about embodying you.

This is why falling in love with you is the ultimate love affair. Because here’s the truth (thank you Peta!):


“Nobody can see you until you can see yourself.”


Hallelujah. Amen. YES.

That’s when your heart guides you to take that leap of faith. That’s when that person or book or saying falls right in front of you. That’s when the sky literally opens up and magic starts to rain on you. The question then becomes, “Imagine what she could have done, if only [she enrolled with that coach or program/read that book/acknowledged that saying.” If only … she said yes to herself.


Can you dare to let yourself be truly seen and truly supported?


Photo Credit: www.athenapelton.com