I learned it from watching you

About a month ago, my family and I moved in with my in-laws. I know what you are thinking, but so far, things have been going quite well. A few bumps here and there, but not as many as you may expect. In fact, this may be one of the best things that has ever happened to me.

Let me explain.

For the last year-and-a-half, I’ve been on a major personal growth and expansion journey. I’ve been on one all my life, but this last year-and-a-half has been intense. My journey recently peaked when my family and I moved to my husband’s hometown to be closer to family and consequently, moved in with his parents.

I thought it would be chaos.

As it turns out, this experience is coinciding perfectly with a major upgrade in my life. This upgrade is bringing me back to my roots, back to my center, back to my soul.

This experience is bringing me back to discipline.

When I was younger, I had my sights set on very specific goals. I would dream about them, I would visualize myself having already accomplished them, and I would create action steps to help me get there.

I had discipline + focus.

I remember taking my SATs. My first score was a 960. I knew that if I wanted to have a chance at getting into the college of my dreams I would need to have a score of 1000 or more. I had a goal. I had an action plan. I had discipline + focus. All summer, I set a schedule and I went to my mom’s office with a self-study course and I studied and practiced and studied some more. I took the SAT again and raised my score by 100 points. I was told that was nearly impossible to do.

But, I did it.

I did it because I had discipline + focus.

Somewhere along the way, I lost this sense of discipline + focus. I started to doubt my decisions, I started to place the needs and opinions of others before my own. I began to believe that I would get bored if I chose one (or two) things to do. I believed that I would be missing out on a better life if I devoted myself to one (or two or three) things.

Discipline + focus became my enemies instead of my allies.

I’ve pondered this at great length and last night, I came to a beautiful conclusion:


Yes! Imagine! Discipline = freedom! This felt counter-intuitive for a long time, but then, with the guidance of a beautiful oracle card from The Animal Spirit Deck by The Wild Unknown, it was finally confirmed: with focus and determination, anything that she puts her mind to she achieves with grace and charm. Now that is freedom!

Now, here is where my in-laws come into play. They’ve ALWAYS known this. ALWAYS. They taught their children this. They live their lives with discipline + focus every single day. I mean, EVERY DAY.

I’ll be honest. This used to bug me. And now I understand why. It used to bug me because it is something I used to do and do well. Along the way, I strayed from it and got lost in a world of people-pleasing, compare-itis, and “I’m not enough-ness”.

My in-laws brought me back. I brought me back.

Last night, I scrolled through all the times in my life when I was best friends with discipline + focus and all the beautiful gifts I received as a result. The list was long, and more importantly, it was powerful.

Thank you, life (and my in-laws!), for allowing me to become reacquainted with my dear friends. I can’t wait to have coffee with them more often!

Where can you invite some more discipline + focus into your life? How would it feel to do so? Let me know by reaching out!

Photo Credit:  The-Numinous.com