Here we are… the last day of 2024. In some ways, I don’t know where the last 365 have gone, and in other ways, I have felt every second of this year.

The last “And that’s a wrap on…” blog post was at the end of September. I wrote the posts for October, November, and December in my mind, but I did not have the energy to commemorate what I experienced in writing. I firmly believe that the teachings of the last quarter of this year were meant to be felt and transmuted and not turned into mental Olympics full of analysis and rumination.

As I completed my last class of The Class* for 2024, it became clear to me what this year has been about: learning to fully trust myself and my decisions, AND …. my FEELINGS.

*The Class is a movement experience unlike any other. Yes, you do jumping jacks and burpees, but you also move energy and clear sh*t it out like no other cardio-based workout I know. If you want to try it out, here’s 30 days free. Use this unique link to experience The Class.

I love learning. In many ways, it is helpful. For example, taking a yoga teacher training helped me learn about teaching yoga. But sometimes (a lot of time?!) I use “learning” as a way to deflect responsibility and self-accountability. Is that 4th yoga teacher training really about learning something new, or is it about acting like I’m doing something useful/productive but I’m really avoiding something else?

I’m seeing this now as I decide how to move forward in 2025 with the foundation I have laid around health, nutrition, and working out. In April, I started working with a macro coach to learn about how to fuel my body properly by tracking macros (carbs, fats, proteins) and incorporating strength training into my days. I jumped right in, as I usually do, with some good results. By jumping in, I relied solely on what the coach told me to do … not much critical thinking or trusting myself involved.

I then felt like I needed to work with a different coach, one who provided more 1:1 attention. This also helped me understand the cycles of macros (maintenance, reverse, deficit) and helped me build my confidence (and make a good dent in my “perfectionist” mentality).

As December rolled around, and price increases had me re-evaluating the coaching relationship, I started exploring other coaches. “Oh, this one is only $20 a week!” “Oh, this one is only $37 a month!” And down the rabbit hole I went.

Then I paused.

I took a couple of hours to look at ALL the information I had amassed from the various influencers and coaches that work in this space. (That’s the fascinating thing about living in the digital age, we can’t really see what we have because it’s buried in our inbox or on some folder on our desktop or in some random app we may or may not still have on our phone.)

What I figured out is that I have everything I needed to 1) calculate my macros (the three coaches gave me roughly the same macro breakdown, give or take 50-75 calories), 2) they all preach walking 8-10,000 steps a day, 3) I found a free strength program and works, and 4) I had 7-8 months’ worth of data on meals that work for me based on the various macro counts. And, that I absolutely LOVE and NEED the movement provided by The Class.

What I was looking for in a coach was someone to blame if things went wrong. (This wasn’t a conscious choice, trust me.) I now know that I was looking for a way to displace accountability and responsibility “((S)he didn’t get my macro count in time, I guess this week is shot!), a way to be REACTIVE instead of proactive. A way to shut off my own ability to think freely and critically about how that day or week was going to look.

In essence, I was handing the steering wheel to someone else while I moved to the passenger side and went where I was told.

And this worked ….

Until it didn’t.

I’ve been aware long enough to know when signs are coming at me like a torrential downpour (so much it can’t be ignored). What the series of signs on this particular journey taught me is:

TO STOP HIDING BEHIND LEARNING and start trusting my preparation, wisdom, and ability to actually do the thing.

It’s time. It’s time to take those first steps out of the nest. It’s time to trust that, in this case, I can calculate my macros correctly and that I can pick the right combination of cardio and strength to help me reach my goals. It’s time to hold myself accountable and be responsible for my actions.

It’s time to motivate myself.

And, it’s time to stop wasting time and mental energy researching the “best” option out of all the options available, ESPECIALLY BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT I NEED TO DO.

The above was very helpful when I didn’t know how to move forward. The key difference is recognizing when the tipping point is reached and when it’s time to let go of the teacher and become the teacher yourself.

So this year has been wild. I started the year with an intention to become stronger and healthier (and leaner), and while the numbers on the scale haven’t moved too much, I KNOW I have built a foundation for the next 365. As they say, a year to learn and a year to do. It’s time to do.

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Another thing I realized is that I truly do know what I want. I truly do know what is best for me. And yes, that changes. And I know I’ve actually listened and trusted myself when it does change. Just like I know something is right for me when I keep coming back to it.

So, this year, this next set of 365 chunks of time, I will trust myself more. I will slow down and pour my attention into the things that I KNOW fill me up. I will stop striving for that magical formula or end goal (because does it really actually exist?) and breathe life into the moments that make up the mosaic of who I am. I am approaching 45 revolutions around the sun, so I should know a little bit about what works and what doesn’t.

And, I will drown out the noise.

I often tell my kids that I can’t think when there is so much noise around me. It’s time to take back control of the dial and turn down the excess noise. And that includes clutter.

My husband helped me rearrange our bedroom so that I could have a space dedicated to journaling. I have my ONE journal (Danielle LaPorte’s Daily Heart-Centered Planner), a light source, a 20-minute candle, and my magical crystal on my desk. That’s it.

I commit to carving out time to plan my week in terms of meals, workouts, and meditations, and paying attention to what I need. I also plan to ask for what I need in order to make this happen (more on this later). I trust myself to be intentional and proactive with the time I am gifted. Amen to that!

Here are some images of the things that I am intentionally curating to help me move forward in 2025 because … Essential Growth …

Cheers to 2024. Welcome 2025.

As a final note, my daughter told me that 2025 is a “WTF” year because we start the year off on a Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. She also told me that the last WTF year was, wait for it, 2020.

I do hope 2025 is a WTF year … one where I consistently rise to the challenges I set for myself and that I know I am capable of accomplishing. One where I deepen my sense of self and develop an unwavering sense of trust. I hope that it brings us all immense joy and a deep sense of reverence and gratitude for the fact that we are simply alive.

I hope that when we close out 2025, we say:

— What a Truly Fantastic Year —

Wishing you everything I know you are capable of and more.

In awe of you,

Gabriela